My Bride list

I sent this list the other day to Donna. But I think that all of these are probably all things that a man of God should look for in his bride. Now granted there might be other stuff and an individual would add, but I think for me this about covers it. This list is broad so I didn't necessarily list everything specifically (ex. I didn't say what I find attractive) but still, I think it's pretty good.

1. Most important is that she has to be not just a Christian but also seeking to be walking with the Lord.
The reality is there are a lot of people who are content with where they are in Jesus. But not her, she seeks the grow, not that she is perfect, no. if she were I wouldn't be able to marry, or even date her because I am far from perfect. It is not about the mistakes that she has made or is making, it is about her seeking God out even in those mistakes.

2. I must find her attractive.
This of course is both a physical and a personality thing. If I don't find them attractive then of course I could not stay with them long.

3. She can't have a calling that conflicts with mine.
We are all called of the Lord to do great things, and whether that thing is to go plant a church in Florida, go be a missionary in China, or just be a witness at your work. Now I feel called to be a pastor, but if the and so my brides calling cannot be something that conflicts with mine because that in turn would create a conflict, and that is not desirable.

4. She needs to be willing to submit to me.
This of course is probably out of all of these, the hardest one for the women to accept. However I need a bride who is going to submit. That is the biblical principle, and just as I am called to love her like Christ loves the church, so she is called to submit to my authority. Now this does not mean that she is to be a slave, no. Far from it, it is more like we are a team, and I am the team captain, and since we are a team it is my responsibility to do what I think is best for it, and it is the brides job to submit to that. It is hard I understand that, and I will do whatever I can to be the kind of leader that my bride will both love and respect, but still this is something that is a requirement of mine, mostly because that is requirement of God.

5. She needs to call me out when I am in sin.
Now submission does not mean that if I am sinning, that she is supposed to stay silent. There are going to be times where I am going to not be loving, where I am going to not be that model for Christ, and while I would want her to do it lovingly, and also only after it being a repeated offense where I aparently am blind to the sin. It is in those times where I would want her to take me to the side and lovingly call me out.

6. She needs to find me funny.
I like making people laugh, and so if the girl found me completely boring, I don't know if I could handle that.

7. She needs to be able to get me, to be willing to have all those silly conversations.
I can picture it now, the middle of the night, with us both laying in bed, I say to my bride, "If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?" and we then discuss. I want a woman who I can be silly with, and she will be silly back. Yet at the same time she can also be serious too when the occasion arises. (It should be noted though that silly and stupid are two different things, and so if I were to do something stupid, like ride down the stairs head first backwards, I wouldn't expect her to cheer me on, instead I think in those situations it would be better for her to try to discourage that.)

8. She needs to know that as my bride her first calling is to me.
This kind of goes along with #3. My bride needs to remember that though others are important, her first calling is to be a helpmate to me. That biblically should be more important than any ministry she may have, including children. Now that is not to say that I am going to be inept and in need of her 24/7, but so often relationships become strained because they lose forget the importance of their spousalhood. This goes for me too of course, my first calling would be to my wife.

9. She needs to let me be romantic and chivalrous.
Now I can at times be both romantic and chivalrous. But we live in a new age, where women don't want that kind of stuff anymore. However because I can't help but be those at times, I need a woman who still wants that.

10. I need to be in love with her.
Now this of course goes without saying. However a woman could fulfill all of these other requirements, but if I don't love them, then I of course would not marry them.