Duncan

We found our cat again today. She had escaped from the apartment by climbing up our rocking chair and putting a hole through the screen on our window. She was gone since Saturday, and honestly we thought she was gone for good. But then we found her, hiding under a car, terrified, hungry and filthy.

The sight of her brought back the memories of when we first found her because she was in the exact same state, terrified, hungry, filthy, and hiding under a car. She had returned to the place where we had found her.

Yet both times, we found her, we lovingly coaxed her to us with tuna, washed her, fed her, gave her toys, and loved her. She is our cat.

All this caused me to think about how we as Christians are often like this. There was a time, when we were marred by sin, starving for truth, and were trapped in a state of hopelessness.

But then Jesus came along. He saw us pursued us, and through love and kindness, He brought us to Himself. He then washed us from our sin, gave us a heavenly home, removed our fear, and fed us with the bread of life.

Yet like Duncan, after a while, there comes a point where we become discontent, this especially happen when we get saved at a young age (Just like Duncan first got brought in as a kitten) we know of His goodness, His love, His continual provision, yet we want more. We eventually envision His palace as if it were a prison, keeping us from doing all those things that are outside of His will that we think will bring joy.

So, when the moment arises, we run. We pursue the things that we thought would bring us joy, and freedom only to find that these things wind up leading us right back to where we first started. Only there is a difference now. While before when we lived in sin, and hopelessness we believed that this was all that there is. But now, we've had the tuna, we have experienced the richness of His grace and love, and so when we have gone back to eating garbage, when we are back in our sin, we find ourselves worse off.

But just like Donna and I pursued Duncan, even when she has fled, and has become dirty, and hungry again because she is our Cat. So Christ seeks us out, even when we run, because we are His.

Finally a new post.

I have started to write a new blog about 20 times so far since my last post and for some reason or another I have yet to finish them. I think that I am just going to toss them especially since most of them are just complaints, and while they may at times feel good to type, they probably wouldn't feel good to read.

Now that being said life has been interesting. God has as of late been showing me that I need to just man up and step out. I have come to realize that I am a cautious person, I used to think that I wasn't, but I am. However, as of late God has been desiring that I step out, to leave from this comfortable place and step out to a place where I feel uncomfortable, where I feel incapable.

First off, next fall I have been asked to teach at the School of Ministry at my church, not the one I am going to, another one. Now I have come to realize that I love teaching. My heart is all for it, but at the same time, I look at the others who are going to be teaching there, my pastor who has been doing ministry for over 30 years, a professor from BIOLA, and my college Pastor, and then I look at myself. I have no experience in this other than taking the classes, and studying the bible myself. In my heart I love the idea, because sharing with people how to study His word is awesome. But as for the rest of me, I have this desire to run, to decline, because who I am to be able to do something like this?

Next, there is the couples study that Donna and I are praying about doing this summer. The more I see the church, the more I am realizing the need for there to be an opportunity for young people who are now married to spend time in the word, in fellowship and in prayer with other young couples. But yet again, the fear arises, there is a need, but who am I to fill it?

Really when it comes down to it, the issue I have comes down to a fear of failure. What if I step out, try these things and I find that I am incapable of doing them?

I see myself wanting to play it safe, to just sit in the kiddie pool. Yet, I can feel God telling me to step out, to get out of the comfortableness of the kiddie pool (which is probably filled with urine from all the other kids playing in it. Not really part of the analogy, but still a disgustingly good point, don't let your kids drink that water, urine and chlorine are not good for them) and to dive head first into the deep end.

I shout "I'm too weak" and He replies "My strength is made perfect in your weakness."

I say, "I don't talk good" (intentionally using improper English) yet He says "Who has made man's mouth... Is it not I the LORD? Now therefore go and I will be with your mouth, and teach you what to say."

I whisper, "but I'm a sinner," and with lovingly compassionate voice He whispers back "I was wounded for your transgressions, I was bruised for your iniquities, the chastisement for your peace was upon me, and by My stripes you were healed. Though you like sheep have gone astray, gone your own way, I have had all your iniquity laid on me. So if you confess your sins, I who am both faithful and just will forgive you of your sins and cleanse you from all unrighteousness."

So I now stand as I stand looking at the kiddie pool and the deep end I have a choice, do I stay comfortable? do I refuse to step out and this live a life of mediocrity? Or do I step out, leave the comfortable in pursuit of that which the Lord would have for me?

The same can be asked of you,

I for one choose the latter.

A Quote

I know it has been a long time since I have blogged about anything. And a good personal biographical one is coming up, however, I wanted to share this quote by Hudson Taylor with you, it has been something that I have been meditating on a lot lately.


"If God has called you to be really like Jesus in your spirit, He will draw you into a life of crucifixion and humility, and put on you such demands of obedience that He will not allow you to follow other Christians; and in many ways He will seem to let other good people do things that He will not let you do. Other Christians and ministers who seem very religious and useful may push themselves, pull wires and work schemes to carry out their schemes, but you cannot do it; and if you attempt it, you will meet with such failure and rebuke from the Lord as to make you sorely penitent. Other may brag on themselves, on their work, on their success on their writings, but the Holy Spirit will not allow you to do any such thing. ; and if you begin it, He will lead you into some deep mortification that will make you despise yourself and all your good works.

"Others may be allowed to succeed in making money, but it is likely that God will keep you poor, because He wants you to have something far better than gold, and that is a helpless dependence upon Him, that He may have the privilege (the right) of supplying your needs day by day out of an unseen treasury. The Lord will let others be honored and put forward, and keep you hidden away in obscurity, because He wants some choice fragrant fruit for His coming glory which can only be produced in the shade. He will let others do a work for Him and get the credit for it, but He will let you work and toil on without knowing how much you are doing; and then to make your work still more precious, He will let others get the credit for the work you have done, and this will make your reward ten times greater when Jesus comes.

"The Holy Spirit will put a watch over you, with a jealous love and will rebuke you for a little words or feelings or for wasting your time, over which other Christians never seem distressed. So make up your minds that God is an infinite Sovereign, and has the right to do as He pleases with His own, and He may not explain to you a thousand things which may puzzle your reason in his dealings with you. He will take you at your word and if you absolutely sell yourself to be His slave, He will wrap you up in a jealous love and let other people say and do many things which He will not let you say or do.

Settle it forever that you are to deal directly with the Holy Spirit, and that He is to have the privilege of tying your tongue, or chaining your hand, or closing your eyes, in ways that He does not deal with others. Now when you are so possessed witht he Living God, that you are in your secret heart pleased and delighted over the peculiar, personal, private, jealous, guardianship of the Holy Spirit, over your life, you will have found the vestibule of heaven.

Hot dogs

So for whatever reason we really sold a lot of hot dogs today. And something that I realized is that when I go to grab the hot dogs for them I say "let me grab your hot dog" or even worse "let me grab your sausage." I have yet to hear a complaint, but just to make things less suggestive, I've been trying to say "let me get THE hot dog." I think it sounds better that way.

The Old Man, and the JW

So this was strange, so strange in fact that I thought that I should write a post about it.

Donna and I went to Starbucks yesterday, it's something we do usually about twice a month to just hang out, talk about what the Lord has been showing us, and even at times go over a Bible passage together.

Anyway at one point in our time together, we started talking about a certain passage in Romans 3, and all of the sudden a man just randomly yells "shalom" at us. He was an old man, probably in his 70s, with one of those Amish beards that was all white. I looked at him, and say "shalom" back and then got back to my discussion with Donna. The man then proceeded to walk up to us and proudly show Donna and I his badge that read "Support for Israel, Sarah Palin."
"OK" I said politely, not entirely sure whether he was Jewish, or what I should say. Before I could say anything, the Old man asked me what version of the bible I was reading, and I said the NKJV. "Oh I don't believe any of that, I only use the King James."
"Oh" I said, "Well the New King James is pretty similar." And it was at that point it began, while I tried to keep things as civil as possible, I was unaware that I was at that point entering into a debate about whether or not the King James was the way to go.
Now to spare you that debate, let's just say things were going alright, I thought, until he said "Well, I don't believe that Jesus was God, or in the Trinity." I at that point realized that that man had bigger problems, so I just tried to drop it.
He then began to accuse Donna and I as "Trinitarians," of being what is wrong with this country. He said that people like us who hold to these narrow views such as the validity of scripture and Jesus being the only way, are keeping this country from uniting, and it is not until people like us cease to exist that we will ever be able to find peace.
He then asked if we had kids, we said no, and he then said "Don't, if you do they will already be doomed." After mumbling to Donna something about staying in her cubby, he and his wife left.

Right as he left, a young man who was "Jehovah's Witness" hearing us say that Jesus was God, came up to us, and then tried to debate or convert us or something, and also another man randomly came up and threw his two cents in, until he realized that he really didn't know what he was talking about, and then soon left. I was able to give out verses, that I hope made sense, but he just ignored my points.

Now I tried not to be argumentative, and I was hoping to at least get the people to think. But I really don't know if any of this did any good. So I will pray for these people.

Anyway, there are two morals to this story, first off, don't make it a point to debate people like that, we can't convince them to come to Christ, all we can do is hopefully make them think. The Holy Spirit will have to do the rest. Debating only leads to arguments, and argument rarely lead to people coming to a knowledge of the truth.
The second point is this though, often Christians are ignorant. They don't know the Bible, and they don't know why they believe what they believe. How then can you come up with things to make them think if you don't even know what you think yourselves.

Missing school already.

I have realized something about myself lately. When I am not doing something that really challenges me, or makes me step out, I find that I fall into what I like to call "the funk." It's a time in which I mentally kind of just shut off, and go for a while just existing. I find that this has really happened to me pretty much every summer of my life as far back as I can remember, with the exception of the last couple of years.
With school being over and work being just a pay check, I can feel this mindset creeping up on me. In the past I didn't really mind this time. But now even thinking about it makes me feel discontent. Honestly I wish that God has just given Donna and I that internship so that I could be doing something. But I know that this is God's doing keeping us here. I know that He is showing me patterns in my life that are really quite selfish, or just plain sinful.
I can see Him allowing me to do things that were great in the past (such as playing video games for an entire afternoon) that I now find empty. He's shaking up my status quo, but in a way in which nothing around me seems to be changing and in many ways I am dreading every minute of it. I can feel that this is either going to be a time of great growth in the Lord, or a time of great Spiritual emptiness, and that it is all going to depend on how I am going to respond. I earnestly pray that I don't go the path of least resistance, and find myself like I have many summers before just existing.

"Jesus Shirt"

So at work I am allowed to wear whatever shirt I want as long as it is red, so the other day I decided to wear my red "Jesus saves" shirt. Anyway that day at work I rang this one dude up that works at target with me, and I apparently gave him 5 dollars extra change. Which he later returned.
Yesterday he came up to me and told me that he originally wasn't going to return the money, but because he saw my "Jesus shirt" he said he felt guilty about it and gave the money back. But then said I owed him 5 bucks.
I just smiled and he walked away. (Donna told me I should have told him to take it up with Jesus that would have been funny).

It's interesting how that worked.

I got an A on my Greek Mid-term btw.